Dos and don'ts of Poland...

Do:

- always always always save a zloty (2 to be extra cautious) for the train station toilets (instead of spending up at the bar the night before)

- take a raincoat and shelve any ideas that you are in for any sort of summer holiday tomfoolery

- enjoy the Zubrowska vodka with apple juice...responsibly ;-)

- engage in conversation with a weasel or 2, they teach you tolerance and patience (essential skills in the world of Interail)

- befriend 1 or more stag parties who offer to buy you rounds of tequila (you may as well cooperate as you don't generally get a choice)

- sample a range of Irish bars (you can take the Brit out of Britain but you can't take Britain out of the Brit)

- dance the funky chicken whilst surrounded by uber-trendy, muscle bound, village people trainee worthy Polish yoof and let them think this is the latest craze sweeping Western Europe (then go back in 10 years to reap the rewards of your teachings)

- book yourself into a hostel worthy of an Alfred Hitchcock set (see in particular The Shining)


Don't:

- bathe in fountains where the local tramp lady has her daily shave

- frequent internet cafes where they issue paedophile ring membership cards

- OD on dumplings, noone will thank you for the resulting bowel issues

- fall for the charms of the tramp who trys to sell you a 1 zloty coin for 10 zloty

- take up offers from men who claim they just want to be your draft excluder for the evening

- spend hours perfecting your Polish pronunciation, nobody (especially the Poles) gives a flying blini. Blank looks all round!!


Happy backpacking, see you in Praha (Prague for those of you not savvy with the local lingo)

Dobry den,

Chazza's Tours (anyone interested in taking said tour should book directly with their local Polskie Sklep)